We're not experts on crack, but we know one thing: IT DON'T SMOKE ITSELF. Here's more proof:
--50-year-old Carlos Sergio Valdes went to Henna Chevrolet in North Austin, Texas on Saturday and asked to test drive a 2013 Tahoe worth $40,000.
--But he drove off in the Tahoe before the dealership gave him permission . . . and two hours later, he called the police to report that the car had been STOLEN.
--Later in the day, police tracked down the stolen SUV and questioned the woman who was driving it. She said that she didn't STEAL the car . . . she TRADED for it.
--Apparently Sergio offered her the car in exchange for two rocks of crack. He was arrested and charged with theft, and they may charge him with additional crimes. There's no word on what happened to the woman who gave him the crack.